


King and a lion heart

by Fallenangel_Winchester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Crowley (Supernatural) Just Wants To Be Loved, Demon Dean Winchester, Kissing, Letters, M/M, Summer Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-12
Updated: 2018-09-12
Packaged: 2019-07-11 13:52:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15973649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fallenangel_Winchester/pseuds/Fallenangel_Winchester
Summary: Crowley remembers how his summer with Dean went...





	King and a lion heart

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a lovely edit from an amazing friend for a club.

Remember…

Do you remember?

 

I guess you don't. Last time I met you, your eyes were the same emerald green, but they weren't the ones I knew so well. They were the kind before you learned to see through me and I saw more in you than your guilt and self-hatred.

 

Do you remember how much fun we had?

The sassy remarks you replied with, the dancing and bad karaoke singing while hustling pool and pretending to be tourists.

 

I never really admitted to you, couldn't even admit it to myself that I found everything you did adorable no matter how annoying it seemed at first. All you had to do was walk into the room with your devil-may-care attitude and incredibly attractive smirk, I'd roll my eyes and everything would be alright.

 

Do you remember when you admitted to me that being a Knight of hell set you free? All the while your eyes shone black a reminder of what you became, a poor replacement for your beautiful eyes. The next day you pretended it didn't happen, but I could tell something changed.

 

I confess I did my fair share of showing you the ropes, teaching you how to manage your urge to kill, even though you still had a part of the old you inside fighting a losing battle.

 

Do you remember how much you laughed at my annoyed look when you gave me the cowboy hat and asked me to wear it?

You probably don't. When I told you that I'd rather be cured, you dared me to put it on all the while smirking at me like you knew what that did to me. Who knows maybe you did, you're smarter than you looked.

 

I can't forget the moment I told you that after Sam's failed attempt to cure me I felt more, emotions I hadn't felt for a long time. Then I told you about my human life and some things about hell and how much I hated being there even though I was a demon.

What surprised me, were your words spoken with so much honesty it almost took the breath I didn't have.

_“ Don't go there. Give orders from here. Let's go somewhere, I don't know anywhere, there must be a place decent enough for the king himself. “_

All I managed to say was a simple

_“ Why? “_

_“ Why not?  Everyone deserves to have a good time, yourself included. “_

 

Do you remember?

I do.

I was there when you almost killed an innocent person, when you barely stopped yourself, your inner demon not strong enough to take over your actions. You still needed your fix so I made it happen as I always did.

That night was the first time you hugged me and quickly left me to freeze outside as you took the fire with you.

Since then I could tell that you started trusting me

To be honest you were a demon, but I there was still a part inside of me that felt bad seeing you cross every bloody line and turn even worse than I could ever be.

 

I was swept away by the storm that was you.

Me! The king of Hell.

I couldn't resist you, I don't think anyone really could especially after they met the real you.

You're free, at least some of the unnecessary guilt and self-hatred faded allowing you to finally enjoy yourself.

Even the black-eyed version of you wasn't as bad as I've ever been, but you seemed to enjoy my company especially my witty remarks.

You even went that far as ordering cocktails with pitchfork straw in them.

 

I remember when you scared every one of my demons who dared to come closer to us and ruin the fun we had. Then you'd chuckle with that carefree deep voice that began to send shivers down my spine. You pretend to be a rebel, but still you managed to end up cuddling to my side claiming it was the tequila that made you do it.

You probably don't remember.

 

What do you remember squirrel?

My Knight of hell… Or I'm not supposed to say that.

You never belonged to anyone, you never will. You belonged to the world yet it didn't know about you, didn't appreciate every sacrifice you did, every drop of blood you lost saving everyone except yourself.

 

Knight of Hell…yes some parts of you held that darkness, but so does every other person on this godforsaken place. Dean, you're born to be loved and worshipped, to be appreciated and respected, the angel weren't the only ones that were able to see people' souls.

I saw yours, bright like a sun, even though the sun can be eclipsed it didn't last long and I knew what we had won't last too.

 

Was it the thrill of the kill or the unbelievable amount of alcohol in you?  

I never found out, but it made you bold enough to kiss me under the moonlight burning my lips before you asked me whether I lied about the reason why I sold my soul.

My answer was a drunken

_“ Want me to show you? “_

An invitation I'd never believed you'd accept, but you just pulled me closer as your eyes returned to their original color and sealed our lips.

 

How can you forget that?!

One night… the fire that consumed us could have burned the whole city without a problem.

The scratches…right they healed erasing every proof of our actions. Mine healed too, but they were engraved in my whole being in the heart I pretended I didn't have.

 

Then everything broke down when Moose called and I knew that he hadn't given up on you. I was selfish, but could understand him. If I was in his place I'd have done the same.

 

I wasn't there to stop him from taking you and I couldn't no matter how much I tried to set you free. Your place was fighting side by side with your brother, not with the King of Hell.

Stupid human blood… it brought out the human part of me, it made me hope. I was careless thinking nothing could stand in our way a proof of how human I became… All because of you.

 

Remember our summer of love?

If you don't there's a proof on my phone. Lots of pictures of you and me, you wouldn't like to be reminded of that times, but you're happy. You can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to me.

 

If you read this letter that means one thing… I died.

Probably because of your moronic plan for saving the world, must have raved about how stupid it was but went along with it.

I could never say No to you.

 

You're free Dean Winchester, you always have been loved and it's about time you accepted and acknowledged it. Maybe my death will kick start some memories, maybe it won't, either way hope you won't remember me as the selfish demon I once was.

I'd say see you in Hell, but that's not where you'll end up.

It's an unbelievable experience knowing you.

 

It's too late now. He couldn't tell him that he remembered him, that he remembered everything that happened between them and that he respected him more than he imagined.

_“ You son of a witch. Had to have the last words. “_

One tear fell then another followed until he couldn't see through the tears. He remembered that time, the only thing that kept him from completely losing control was Crowley and now he was dead because of him.

That was the moment he realized that he actually cared about him, the black-eyed version of him would go that far to admit that he loved him….

Well… it wasn't the worst thing that happened to him. Not at all.


End file.
